Breaking
by Isabella C. Mills
Summary: Regina Mills deals with the loss of love in Storybrooke, 2014, and in the Enchanted Forest before her days as the Evil Queen.
1. Chapter 1

Part 1: Forest

Chapter 1:

"To the return of your heart." Robin said.

Glasses clicked, and the fireplace flickered. Regina smiled and looked at Robin, in awe of how someone could actually love her as much as he did – someone other than Henry.

"So, how does it feel?" Robin asked.

Regina felt true happiness within her heart. She felt the light of true love was slowly removing the darkness of her heart.

"Stronger than ever." She said, truthfully.

Their lips met, and they kissed. Finally, Regina could love again. She felt tears come to her eyes. She couldn't remember the last time she cried of happiness, the last time she felt something as pure, without complications.

"What is it?" he asked, for she had pulled away.

"I just, never thought I'd have this. "

He nodded, and she laughed, joyful at last.

"After I lost my wife, I felt like that for a long time," he sighed. "Her death was my fault."

Regina saw guilt in his eyes. His wounds had healed, but his scars would never go away. She, of all people, understood that.

"I'm sorry"

"I would've walked through hell, to be with my Marian again, but when I finally admitted to myself that she was gone, that she was never coming back, I had to let that guilt go."

Regina looked into Robin's eyes. Beautiful and wise, for they had seen much; they had cried endlessly, just like hers. Maybe, just maybe, the two of them were more alike than she thought. This was her second chance, too.

"My first love, Daniel, was killed because of me," she whispered. So few people knew of this. She had never told anyone before, of her guilt; she had never admitted that she didn't truly blame Daniel's death on Snow White; she blamed it on herself."

"And that's why you never wanted to open yourself up again."

Regina felt vulnerable, but she didn't feel weak, she had finally let this go. She now, could truly, move on, and be happy.

"Tinker Bell told me it was possible, that I could love again. And, she led me to this tavern, to a man who, she said I was destined to be with." She smiled.

"I never saw his face, but." She paused, knowingly, and gently took Robin's arm.

"I did see his tattoo."

"It was me?" Robin said incredulously.

"Yes." She said, not believing the words herself.

"I was just too scared to approach you."

Robin chuckled gently, looking at Regina lovingly.

"Well, maybe," he began, " things work out when they're supposed to. Maybe, it's all about timing."

He stroked her hair. She rested her head on his shoulder, and felt his embrace. She closed her eyes and just lay there.

…..

"Roland!" Regina called.

The little boy ran to her, and she held his hand. Robin smiled.

"Aren't you motherly?" Robin said, grinning.

Upon hearing this remark, Regina remembered her past. How the king had said he recognized her motherly ways. She felt a flicker of fear in her heart, a fear of loss. The moment quickly passed, as she remembered how different everything was now.

"I have thirteen years of experience."

He kissed her forehead, and she felt warm. Everything had completely changed now. Perhaps her happy ending was finally here.

As they arrived at Granny's, Regina looked at Henry, he looked at her and smiled. She had made him proud, and he had seen the good in her she was still surprised to find.

He was reading a story, to Snow's little baby, his uncle. Snow held the baby, joyful, and Regina wasn't bothered, for she too was happy.

"And that's when the bandit leapt on top of the carriage and stole the prince's jewels. The prince chased the thief on horseback, through the treacherous forest."

Regina sat down, with Robin and Roland. She saw Emma enter with the pirate, and help retell the story of Snow White and Prince Charming, despite initial, playful protests.

"Should we go?" Robin asked Regina, signaling to the booth that had caught her attention.

"No, I wouldn't want to ruin this moment."

"You haven't had much trouble in the past."

"I've-"

"changed. Yes, I've realized."

Regina smiled, and looked over to the booth.

"…ran away, and was living on a farm." Red was telling. All of that seemed so silly now, so far in the past.

"Well, it seemed like such a peaceful life. Running away from everything." Snow smiled, remembering those days.

"Like mother, like daughter." Hook remarked, slyly.

Emma seemed distraught, and murmured to him.

"What is he talking about?" Henry asked.

"Should we read more stories?" Charming said nervously, covering for his daughter.

"Actually," Regina said as she stood, "I'd like to know what the pirate is talking about."

"It's nothing."

"Are you planning on moving back to New York?" she said, raising her eyebrows. Robin put his arm around her, probably sensing her worry, beneath the apparent confidence.

"Why would we go back to New York?" Henry asked, confused.

"You're not," Regina said quickly, outraged by Emma's sudden authority over Henry. Regina had given everything up for them to be happy together, but she couldn't just take him away. Regina was his mother. "Right Ms. Swan?" she said, looking at her.

"Actually, it's complicated." Emma replied, uncertain.

"Why would we leave? This is our home." Henry said

"Henry, this isn't the time or place." Emma said.

"I think it is." Regina interrupted in a calm, but aggressive manner.

"No, it's not." Emma said, and she went outside.

Regina rolled her eyes at Emma Swan's overdramatic nature and placed her hand on Henry. He didn't want to leave, so he wouldn't. Her son wasn't going anywhere.

"Grandpa, look." Henry pointed outside.

There was a giant tornado of light. Zelena's time portal had opened.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

"Zelena is gone." Charming said.

"No! She was here when I left her" Regina said in disbelief.

"Well, she escaped," Belle said, "that would explain the time portal."

Regina sighed, confused, and slightly angered at being outmaneuvered.

"Impossible," she said, "Without her pendant she's powerless. How could she have escaped, let alone opened a time portal, without magic?"

She turned to Rumplestiltskin.

"Unless," she paused "you did something to her," she said accusingly.

"Well, I'm sorry to disappoint, but no. Even if I wanted to, Belle has my dagger, she would certainly curve any homicidal tendencies." Rumplestiltskin said.

"True." Belle said, showing a small, sly smile.

Regina looked at him skeptically. Logic would prove him innocent, but when magic is involved, logic doesn't have much use. She let him be, for she had other concerns other than blaming that imp.

"Well, she escaped, let's find out how." Charming said, as he played the tapes taken by the video camera. There was Zelena, and suddenly, the screen flashed, and lost its signaled.

In a moment, her figure reappeared, and the screen displayed Regina's sister, as she turned herself to stone and committed suicide. Regina felt a pang of sadness, despite everything.

"Well it seems that her escape was of a more permanent nature. I won't ask for an apology" Rumplestiltskin said.

"She must have had just enough residual magic to do herself in," Regina said, "And when she did, and she was gone, the magic in her pendant had no tether. It was set free, her last wish fulfilled."

"So how do we unfullfill it?" Robin asked

"Excellent question, but until we figure it out, no one should go near it," said Rumplestiltskin, "a trip to the past could have catastrophic repercussions".

Regina silently agreed.

…..

Regina, embraced Robin, feeling so lucky to have him, so very fortunate. They walked to Granny's. Regina held Roland's hand, and thought she might actually make a great stepmother to him. She still needed a little redemption in that area.

She had learned to love again, she who had been in fear of love, she who was its enemy. It had brought loss, she hadn't thought of it like this, since, well since her first love. She had never allowed herself to feel it, even with Henry; it never came naturally to her. But now, she felt she could. Henry had told her she was a hero now. Perhaps he was right.

Robin had brought light into Regina's life. He helped her when she had lost the one thing she loved. He had saved her, when he thought of her only as the evil queen. But he saw through that. She laughed at her happiness, at how much she had changed.

Roland stepped inside Granny's and Regina looked at Robin. She could not comprehend how somebody could love her. She didn't understand how someone would take the time to heal her wounds, to forgive her for everything she had done.

They kissed. He embraced her, and pulled her closer. She looked, and smiled.

They stepped in, and Robin sat down with Roland.

"Regina, there's something you should know. I brought someone back from the past."

Regina raised her eyebrows at Emma. The past didn't appeal too much. She had tried to put it behind her, to let it go.

"This woman, and she still thinks of you as," Emma paused, and looked at Regina, possibly fearing she would hurt her.

"Evil." Regina said, as she felt a bit of pain from her past flood to her.

"I'm gonna bring her over. I already told her that it's okay, but it's sensitive. If she met you, she'll see –"

"I understand" Regina said softly.

The woman approached her fearfully; there was hate in her eyes. Had Regina killed her family? The Evil Queen killed so many, she couldn't remember. She smiled at the woman, trying to ease her mind, to prove to the girl, and herself, that she truly had changed. Even Emma had said that hadn't she?

"Regina, I would like you to meet –"

"Marian?" Robin said, with a dazed, perplexed look in his eyes.

"Robin?"

"I thought you were dead," Robin said.

Regina realized what Emma had done. That woman, was Robin's deceased wife, previously deceased, that was. Then, Regina felt it, the pain from the past. She had felt just a touch with a reminder of whom she had been, but now, she was drowning in it. She felt taken, and tears came to her eyes. This time, it wasn't her fault. It was Emma Swan's.

"You," she said, as she looked at her. Her voice was shaken, as she softly whispered "You did this?"

"I just wanted to save her life." Emma said, with an apologetic look in her eyes.

Regina felt pain. Love, would only inflict pain, at least to Regina. She wanted to die, to escape it all, to leave. She couldn't let her agony show; it was her weakness.

"You're just like your mother. Never thinking of consequences."

"I didn't know." Emma said.

"Of course you didn't!" Regina said, her voice rising, "You just better hope to hell you didn't bring anything else back."

Regina had thought differently of Emma Swan, she had come to respect her, for she too, had suffered much, and had flaws. She too, had just recently opened herself to love. But she hadn't lost it nearly as many times as Regina.

Regina stormed out, as tears streamed from her cheeks. She headed to her house, feeling a hole in her heart open, hurting, and breaking. Regina wasn't incapable of love. She knew all to well how to love. But no one would be capable of loving her, not ever again. Not after who she was. It was her fate, and there was no changing it.

…..

Regina woke up, and she remembered everything. Before she realized it, her face was covered in tears, her darkened heart filled with sorrow and doubt in the power of love. Love, that was supposed to bring happiness, but now only brought her pain. Two days ago, it had made her happier than she had ever been, but of course it all had to be taken away. She laughed bitterly at her stupidity. Had she learned nothing? Villains don't get happy endings. She couldn't believe she had let herself forget that. She wept, and she was overflowing with regret. She had begun to believe in love again, what a total idiot.

She lay in bed, and looked at the ceiling. Everything felt so empty inside, still that same hole. Had this all been her fault? No, this time it hadn't. Suddenly, she felt the sorrow mix with anger, that lust for revenge she knew all to well. Emma Swan had turned out to be just like her parents. Regina had actually thought she was different, but no, she was just as idiotic as they were, and frankly as Regina herself was. All it took was a day in the Enchanted Forest, and Emma Swan had ruined Regina's life.

Regina wondered if she deserved all this pain. She smirked. The answer was so clear. She deserved it more than anyone. How many lives had Regina ruined – how many lives had she taken? But apparently, fate had a sense of humor, for she saw Rumplestiltskin had ruined more lives than she had. He'd had more time at it, after all. What was the Dark One's punishment? The man that had not only turned Regina to darkness, but had done so much wrong, was getting married, with his true love. "How perfect" she whispered.

Apparently, everyone but Regina would get their happy ending. Possibly even Neal. And he was dead. Snow White had just named her second child, Emma was madly in love with the pirate, and Robin had been reunited with his long lost wife, who was supposed to be dead. Regina smiled at the irony. Zelena had committed suicide, and succeeded beyond her expectations at the same time. Regina's thoughts were interrupted by a knock on the door.

"Henry?" she said, her voice shaking. She slowly made her way downstairs, and opened the door. There stood Emma Swan.

"I'm not in the mood." Regina said, as she shut the door, but Emma stopped it.

"Regina, wait."

"Goodbye Ms. Swan."

"I'm sorry, Regina. I really am." Emma came in and looked at Regina sadly, with genuine regret. Regina felt tears trickle down her cheeks, completely unable to contain them. She felt so vulnerable, and she hated it. Suddenly, Emma embraced Regina.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Regina said angrily. She did not want, or need, Emma Swan's support. Emma Swan had started all of this, and Regina hated her.

"I'm sorry, Regina. I really am. I know it doesn't make a difference, but I didn't know. It's not over. He loves –"

"Of course it's over! His dead wife is back, his first love, the mother of his child. Why on Earth would he pick me, the Evil Queen who had probably meant to kill her?"

"You'll never stop being a villain until you realize you can be a hero. He sees that in you, he doesn't see you as the Evil Queen, he sees you -"

Regina shut the door. She wished so badly for that to be true, but she knew they weren't. A cold breeze whipped through Emma Swan's blonde hair, as Regina watched her from the window. How dare she? Emma Swan could not help her; she could not heal the wounds she had reopened.

Revenge would be coming. Regina was quite experienced with it, and that family would always avoid it. Once, Charming had called her part of that family. She wasn't. Her only family was Henry, he was the only family she'd ever have, and the only family she'd ever need.

…..

Henry put his arms around his mother.

"Mom, you can cry around me. I love you, and I know you want to be strong, but heroes cry too."

Regina hugged him, and silently thanked him. She let herself cry. She hadn't actually just cried in quite a while. They stood there, embracing.

"Thank you Henry, I love you."

"I love you too."

Regina smiled. Henry loved her.

"Come on. I have something to show you."

He took Regina's hand, and led her to his castle, the same one where he always hid. In this castle, Henry had hidden from Regina.

"You've changed, mom. I don't want you to forget that you aren't a villain anymore."

"Henry, I am. That's who I am, and there's no changing it."

"You haven't killed Emma."

Regina looked at Henry silently. The silence was her apology. She would never have the opportunity to say it.

"You haven't killed her, right?"

"No."

"There's something you're not telling me," Henry paused. "You want to kill her."

"Henry I –"

"No! You've come so far. Don't throw it all away!"

"This time it wasn't my fault. She did this!"

"She saved a woman's life. That's what good guys do."

"You're on her side?" Regina felt her voice rising.

"She's my mother too."

Regina closed her eyes and took a deep breath.

"You promised me you would change. You have changed, so much. You're doing it all for me." Henry said.

"And what good did it do me? I did change, and look where it got me!"

"You can love."

"Love only causes pain."

"Don't you love me?"

"That's different" Regina said softly.

"No it isn't!"

"Henry, you know I love you more than anything."

"I love you too. And I believe in you"

"But you're on her side."

"This isn't a war!"

"Of course it is. It always has been, and it always will be,"

She started shaking, and she stopped crying. She wasn't the mayor of Storybrooke, Regina Mills was the Evil Queen.

"And this time, I will win."


End file.
